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| Top left is my new ACL. Did you every think you'd see pictures of the inside of me??? |
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| Graph incision closing up... though not perfectly. |
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| Right after surgery (rather, the next day). So swollen. |
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| Healing! |
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| Looking better! |
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| Right after I took the bandage off (24 hours later?) |
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| I mean, ewwwww. This was the worst of the bruising. |
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| Out of order pics... right after taking the ace bandage off |
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That right there is my torn ACL.
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Seven weeks post surgery!
Do I recommend taring your ACL? NOPE! I had an amazing orthopedic surgeon (who happens to have a son in my daughter's class and a daughter about the same age as my son, what?!) and my physical therapists have been nothing short of awesome dealing with all my "poor me" attitude. I go to PT twice a week where they work on my knee (some days are better than others) and I try not to cry from the pain they inflict. I know, there are people who are way stronger than me and whipped through their recover with no problem (bravo, don't fucking talk to me), BUT everyone is different! I had massive bone bruising which didn't help. AND and and and, when going through surgery, I had two parts of my hamstring used for the graph, BUT it wasn't enough. So, the surgeon called the hubs and asked, "do you think she'll be okay with a cadaver graph?" No shit, Isaac heard the beeping of my monitors in the background. Thankfully he knows me well enough that he said it wouldn't be a problem at all. So, surgery lasted a little longer than expected.
Groggy and in LOTS of pain, Isaac took me home and cared so well for me. Even the kids pitched in and helped so much! (maybe a testament of how well I take care of them?) The kids fought over who was going to help me with what (don't worry, they aren't saints and it wore off after a few days). But I tell ya, I didn't realize how much I did until I couldn't do it anymore. Asking for an extension in my my school work was hard because I thought I could do it all. Asking for help getting food, doing laundry, making sure kids were up and ready to go... hubs did it all and without complaining. Heck, it's not like it was just the kiddos he was taking care of, he was taking care of me too and any work things that came up (he was working remotely because his boss is amazing).
Hubs going back to work was THE WORST because that meant I had to get back to doing ALL THE THINGS. Kids, cleaning, running the entire household... if you've never been a parent the shhhhhhhhhhhh, no one fucking cares, it's A LOT. I think I'm doing good, then shopping at two stores and a day of running around later I pretty much cry myself to sleep because the pain is so freaking bad. Yes, I do grocery store and even Target pick ups, but there are times when you need what you need and you need it now. Shoot, just look at my bank statement and Amazon has pretty much raped me of all my dignity.
Luckily, I go to one of the best fully online universities, so my masters program has not suffered (too much). Still pulling A's (by a landslide) and it may just be because I actually really freaking love my master program, OR I have some super amazing understanding professors... or both.
There are days I still feel like I'm failing in an epic way, but then there are days I feel like I am totally crushing it. I want to be better NOW, but the body takes time to heal. For those wondering, "how long does it take?" A whole freaking YEAR, and then some. The graph and healing of a repaired ACL takes about a year, and knowing my body, it will take the full time.
Time heals all.
